Thursday, December 13, 2012

Mondays and Enemies

Hi all.  We haven't really posted anything recently about what the heck we're even doing these days, so I'll run everyone through a typical week now-a-days:

Monday:  Fill the brite tank.  The brite tank is the final resting place for our cider before it's either canned or kegged.   We awake our cider from its cold conditioning in the cooler and pump it into the brite.  The tank itself holds about 800 gallons of juice, along with a lot of pressure.  We introduce CO2 to the cider, and they dance overnight and then in the morning, POOF, we've got a nice, carbonated, finished product (it's a little more technical, but I prefer my explanation).  We then clean the conditioning tanks and go home.  At home we take care of fun things like entertaining the hoards of government agencies that regulate everything we do, paying off mountains of bills, and fending off sales people who want us to sponsor their events.  I can save us all some time though:  in a typical week we eat about 8-10 pb&j's, and another 8-10 grilled cheese sandwiches.  Does that sound like the diet of a strong cash flowing company.  I think you're looking for a small VT company called Woodchuck, I hear there's some loose cash flowing over there (I see you Canney and Dan in Rutvegas).

I just realized it's going to be way too long to write what we do in a week, so I'll just break it down over a few blogs.  If I wrote it all out I think the only people who would read the whole thing would be with our moms.

I will add one more note about a seemingly one-sided arch-enemy situation we've found ourselves in.  It's a pretty funny little story.  I won't give any names, and I won't tell you if you ask, so don't bother.  So there exists a beverage company somewhere on planet earth that utterly DESPISES Downeast Cider House.  It all started a year or so ago when we posted a blog about having a promotional party at a bar in Maine.  It wasn't anything over the top, just a bunch of Downeast posters everywhere, and we were walking around with trays of shot glasses with cider samples (that we bought).   A few days afterwards we got a call from the Maine liquor licensing agency asking questions about the party.  After they came to the conclusion that nothing illegal was done I pressed him to find out how he came to hear of any of this, which is how I found out someone had read our blog and called in to report us, twice!  I pressed further and found out who.

I also found out from a sales rep who works for one of our distributors that this company was spreading weird little "news releases" to them such as telling our rep that we weren't going to be canning or packaging, etc.  Odd.  This company also informed a different distributor's sales rep that they would "put [Downeast] out of business".  Those are just a few.  We've had reports of this from ALL of our distributors.  Hate isn't a good look on anyone.

But, it goes on!  Most recently we checked their website and found out a few interesting facts about our own cider that we didn't even know.  Apparently, we don't use local apples.  Yet Harpoon's cider does.  Those damn snake in the grass cider mills!  I always had a sneaking suspicion that they were pressing the juice, then separating the local and non-local juice, and giving us out-of-town stuff.  Either that or those quaint local apple farms are putting up fronts for their back-door Chinese import operations.  You can never be too careful with these folks.  Also, we apparently add sugar and and flavorings.  I guess there is sugar in apple cider, so we're all guilty?  As yes, guilty as charged with adding flavorings, but it was really really hard to market our "Original, Original Blend", which was an empty, vacuum sealed can.  It was sooo pure, but due to complaints, we decided to flavor it with some hard cider.  Finally, we learned our abv isn't actually 5.1%.  We thought that since we were the ones who made it every day that we would be keen on that sort of info, but we've been set straight.  I'm sure samples have been sent to labs for the appropriate testing.  Much appreciated!

Anyways, we've learned quite a bit about ourselves from this other company, and we'll certainly have to consult them in any future proceedings, lest we make careless mistakes like allowing people to enjoy samples, knowing what we make, and generally existing.  But most importantly, everything you read on the internet is true.

Well, off to can some cider, enjoy your holidays.  Be safe, and enjoy some local ciders and beers, we recommend Bantam Cider (the cherry is awesome), Jack's Abby Brewing (smoke and dagger is off the charts good), both of whom are from Mass, or if you're in Maine, give Urban Farms Fermentory a try (lots of cool experimental stuff), Fatty Bampkins (I hear good things about their Dry), and if you're into a really good, easy drinking beer, get at some Oxbow.

--Downeast

PS - I think I've been watching too much South Park