Monday, April 1, 2013

A Hawk's Tale (Kind of Gross)

At about 10 this morning, we had our doors open to let some of that nice April breeze inside, and in the blink of an eye, there was absolute mayhem. As we saw a giant bird fly in, I either bellowed in a deep growl "HAWK, how majestic!" or I kinda screamed in a high pitch voice, "holy shit, an owl", depending on your perspective (I'm still pretty sure it was the former, although others attest to the latter).

So the hawk came in and dropped something on the ground, then flew up to the ceiling, where it proceeded to make an absolute scene, crashing into all the pipes and not being nearly as smart as we expected of a bird of prey. I glance over at the ground, and there's something going kinda nuts. I notice it's a pigeon, bleeding. The hawk had eaten part of its breast, before it decided to come finish its meal inside.

Keep in mind, at this point we're only a few seconds into the hawk's entrance. Out of nowhere, big crash. I look back over to our office, where our black lab Morty is tied up to our table, and Morty is bolting for the pigeon. He snapped the leg off our table, knocking over all of our computers, speakers, router, papers, etc. He then snagged the pigeon, and unfortunately, didn't kill it (it was suffering) but just played with it. Neadless to say, there was a lot of yelling and feathers. Fast forward to a couple hours later, the hawk is still glaring at us from its perch near our ceiling (about 30' up), flying around like a lunatic every few minutes, and just being a general menace.

About 3 hours, just as swift as it came, the hawk was gone. The pigeon was put out of its misery, and order has been restored to Winterfell, I mean Downeast. So today we pour one out for our fallen homie, the brave pigeon that fought tooth and nail in the great hawk battle of 2013. You defended us bravely, Pigeon, it was an honor to serve with you sir, and may you strut around for eternity picking up breadcrumbs off the pearly, trash-ridden sidewalks that lie above. Rest in Peace.

**Side note. For those concerned, none of this happened near any product, or cans, or anything like that, not that it could, because everything is a closed system.**

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